SO TIRED...NO ENERGY

I'VE BEEN SO TIRED THIS WEEK, IT SEEMS AS IF I DON'T HAVE ENOUGH ENERGY TO MAKE IT THROUGH THE DAY. I STILL HAVEN'T FINISHED THE LAUNDRY AND WHEN DONNY CAME IN THIS MORNING HE WAS PISSED SAYING HOW DIRTY IT WAS IN HERE. I SWEAR THAT MAN IS SO ANAL, OUR HOUSE IS SPOTLESS MOST OF THE TIME. IT WAS A LITTLE DIRTY FOR A MINUTE BUT I SAW HOW MUCH IT BOTHERED HIM SO I WOULD RUN AROUND CLEANING LIKE A MAD PERSON. THAT JUST MADE ME STRESSED AND UPTIGHT ALL OF THE TIME. IM STILL SWEEPING LIKE EVERYDAY AND MAKING SURE THE DISHES ARE DONE. I AM ONLY ONE PERSON I CAN'T DO EVERYTHING. IT'S WORSE WHEN WE ARE GONE ALL DAY AND THEN AS SOON AS WE GET HOME OLIVIA'S FRIENDS COME KNOCKING ON THE DOOR. SO I CHANGE SOFIA'S DIAPER, GRAB A BOTTLE OR SNACK FOR HER, AND WATCH OLIVIA PLAY. AND IT'S WORSE IF I HAVEN'T STARTED DINNER BY THAT TIME BECAUSE WE WERE GONE ALL DAY SO DONNY DOESN'T HEAR NOISE WHILE HE IS SLEEPING. LAST NIGHT WE DIDN'T EAT DINNER UNTIL 8:30PM AND I DIDN'T GIVE THE KIDS A BATH. I READ THEM SOME BOOKS, BRUSHED THEIR TEETH, AND PUT THEM TO BED. I MIGHT GO TO THE STORE TODAY TO GET A FEW THINGS BUT WE ARE STAYING HOME FOR MOST OF THE DAY. IT'S HARD FOR ME TO CLEAN AFTER I PUT THEM TO BED BECAUSE I'M SO TIRED I USUALLY JUST SIT ON THE COUCH AND CRASH EVERY NIGHT. ON THE WEEKENDS I LIKE STAYING CLOSE TO HOME BECAUSE WHILE DONNY IS HOME IT'S EASIER FOR ME TO CLEAN. AND THIS IS THE REASON WHY THE HOUSE IS A MESS BECAUSE HE WANTS TO LEAVE THE HOUSE PRACTICALLY ALL DAY. HE IS STARTING TO MAKE ME VERY ANGRY BECAUSE HE EXPECTS ME TO COOK TOO. THERE ISN'T ENOUGH HOURS IN THE DAY FOR ME TO COOK, CLEAN AND STAY GONE ALL DAY. I AM NOT GOING TO START COOKING AT 7PM. AND SOMETIMES WE DON'T GET HOME UNTIL 9PM OR 10PM. HE MUST BE SMOKING DOPE IF HE THINKS IM GOING TO COME IN AND CLEAN AFTER THAT. HE'S NOT BEING REALISTIC AT ALL. LAST NIGHT HE SENT ME A MESSAGE THAT HE HAD TO PICK SOMEHTING UP AND HE NEEDED A LOT OF SLEEP WHICH MEANS HE WANTS ME TO LEAVE SO THE HOUSE ISN'T A MESS. I SWEAR EVERYDAY I AM RUSHING HOME BECAUSE WE STAY GONE ALL DAY UNTIL HE GOES TO WORK. SO AS SOON AS WE GET HOME I AM RUNNING TO GET THE KIDS OUT OF THE CAR AND BAGS OF GROCERIES OR DIAPER BAG. IF I LEAVE STUFF IN THE CAR HE GETS MAD. OK ANY PERSON UNDER THIS PRESSURE WILL JUST SNAP AND I DO. I SNAP ON HIM A LEAST ONCE A WEEK. HE IS ACTING LIKE A CHILD... I WANT, I WANT, I WANT. SO THIS WEEK I HAVE BEEN SO TIRED AND I DON'T CARE IF HE'S UPSET ABOUT THE HOUSE. I GO TO SLEEP AND NOT STRESS ABOUT IT. HE HAS CLEAN CLOTHES BUT HE HAS CERTAIN UNDERWEAR THAT HE WANTS TO WEAR AT WORK. AND WHEN EVERYTHING IS PERFECTLY CLEAN WITH ALL HIS CLOTHES CLEAN IN THE DRAWER AND HUNG UP IN THE CLOSET HE COMPLAINS ABOUT SOMETHING ELSE THATS RIDICULOUS. SO THIS IS WHY I HAVEN'T PUT THE LAUNDRY UP, MY BODY IS ON A STRIKE AND JUST WON'T DO IT. I DIDN'T GO TO COLLEGE TO BE SOMEONES DOOR MAT, I AM NOT THE TYPE OF WOMEN THAT GETS OFF ON PUTTING MY HUSBANDS WANTS AND NEEDS FIRST. YESTERDAY WHILE RUNNING, THE STUPID DOG RAN OUT OF THE DOOR SO I HAD TO CHASE HIM DOWN THE ROAD. SOMETIMES I'M SO STRESSED I DON'T EAT DINNER UNTIL I PUT THE KIDS TO BED OR I DON'T EAT AT ALL. SO INSTEAD OF NOT EATING LATELY I JUST DON'T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT THE LAUNDRY. OKAY WELL I GUESS I AM DONE RANTING FOR RIGHT NOW. IM GOING TO GIVE THE GIRLS A BATH NOW INSTEAD OF LATER. SOFIA POORED MILK ALL OVER HER TABLE AND ALL IN HER HAIR. SO HER HAIR IS SMASHED TO HER FACE. I HAVE TO GET SOMETHING FOR DINNER BECAUSE YESTER DAY I WAS RUNNING AND RUNNING, SO I JUST GOT DINNER FOR LAST NIGHT. I TOLD OLIVIA SHE COULDN'T PLAY BUT HER FRIENDS ARE RIGHT NEST TO THE WINDOW COLLECTING ROCKS, SO WILE I AM FOLDING THE LAUNDRY, I AM WATCHING HER PLAY.